Hang Tuah VS Samurai

1. One day , two friends were talking at a Kopi Tiam :

Friend 1 : I am a better man now as I have stopped gambling and drinking!

Friend 2 : I don't believe you at all....

Friend 1 : wanna BET? or just buy me jug of BEER ?

Friend 2 : ???!!!

2. Another two friends were walking and about to step on a chocolate looks a like, a brownish in colour at one roadside.

Friend 1 : Ooop... That's a chocolate or shits ?

Friend 2 : I don't know.. let us pick it up and taste it

They tested it... and it was confirmed a human shits

Friend 1 & 2 : It's someone shits ! ... Wo.. wo...so lucky we didn't step on it !!!

3. A Samurai heard about Hang Tuah's bravery and came to Melaka to challenge him. They had fights for 8 days/7 nights and both were equally strong with their own experties , fighting technics and usage of weapons. Finally, the King called both of them for the final event.

The king said, there are two flies and I wanted both of you to show me your expertise. Without delay, the Samurai lashed out his sword fast as lightning and cut a fly into 4 small pieces and smiled proudly at Hang Tuah. Hang Tuah was cooled, took out his kris slowly and stabbed another fly. The fly, however continued flying around and was heading to the palace's wooden pillars, knocked his head few times and fell down.

Samurai : What's the pppbbblem??? (What's the problem?)

Hang Tuah : I cut his private part !!! he was so frustrated and committed suicide !

Samurai : Plybate partooh ??? oooh Waka ranai yooo (I don't know ohh) how did you do that??


Hang Tuah : Well.... You know me !!!

The King declared Hang Tuah as the winner . The Samurai accepted the loss and never returned